Nothing tugs at our heart-strings like our relationships to those we love, whether they be pleasant or painful. Consider, for a moment, these two immutable facts that heavily impact relationships: we cannot change the truth and we cannot choose for people. To the degree that we accept these two facts, we will better understand God and people, and live with the consequences.
First, God is the sole source of all truth (Deuteronomy 32:4; Psalm 119:160; John 14:6) and God does not change (Malachi 3:6), therefore the truth does not change. We may delude ourselves into believing something is true that is not (James 1:22), we may ignore the truth, as if that will make the truth cease to exist (Ephesians 4:18) or we may suppress the truth, believing that the imposition of a falsehood makes it truth (Romans 1:18) but it does not change the fact that the truth still exists as the truth, whether we concede it or not. It is a losing battle to fight against the truth. The sooner we accept the truth, the happier we will be; there is no comfort or joy in lies.
Second, we cannot fix people. We have been given by God the divine right to make choices. From the beginning, the tree of good and evil in the Garden of Eden embodied the choices that humanity makes and reveals the consequences of those choices. No matter the concern or love we may have for someone (God loved Adam and Eve), no matter the effort or influence we invest (the Garden was perfect), people are still responsible for their own choices. Even God will not save us by force; we must choose to submit to Him (Joshua 24:15; Matthew 16:24). Therefore, if someone we love makes poor choices (no matter the reason), we cannot change or deny the consequences, no matter how much it pains us that someone we love chose poorly. We can deny the consequences, of which the Bible speaks plainly (Deuteronomy 30:19-20), or we can delude ourselves into thinking someone we love is acceptable when the Bible clearly says they are not (John 8:24; Luke 13:3, 5; Matthew 10:32-33; Mark 16:16; Revelation 2:10). If one’s belief is not supported by Bible truth, it is not of God (Romans 10:17).
Our acceptance of the unchanging nature of God’s truth and our concession to the reality of a human being’s freedom of choice are two critical facts that will ground us in faith. Denying either of these two facts is delusional and devastating.